I, honestly, LOVE your story. Your's is the kind that I can wait months for the update and not forget about it.
:)

I really like this story and characters. You never see any decent horror stories anymore. But I must say yours is fantastic.

This is well-written and intriguing. The story proceeds at a quick pace without rushing, and your unique writing style appeals to me. The first-person viewpoint feels natural and casual even with the sophisticated vocabulary used.

I notice a few adverbs that could be removed, which would tighten up the writing. Other than that, I don't see much to critique. I'm looking forward to future chapters.

wow this was really well written! seriously, i don't find many truly well written stories here--ones that have the quality that makes me feel like i'm reading a published work. good job to both of you. i did see some spelling and grammar, so you might want to check up on that, but no "I" where it shouldn't be. that's a real challenge, but you're both doing wonderful at it! and both of you also write very alike. awesome descriptions, and just a way with words that makes things seem so...i'm not sure...submersing is probaly the best word i can think of :)
lively characters, too!! i have a character named Damien, actually (not posted, though) so i thought that was neat. well anyway, all the characters' relationships were established to a good extent, and the way they interact makes them even more real!! i love the characters.
the excitement really builds at the end of this last chapter--i'm anticipating more!! good luck with this. and happy writing!

~Samantha Marie

Wow. You guys never seem to disappoint, do you? This chapter is great! I know a good story when I read one.

(screams) Agh! Poor Paige, she's my favorite! Great chapter guys, it was my fav. chapter so far. Great cliffhanger, too. My friend Braden is a little bemused, (he's as harmful as a flower) but otherwise I love it!

Great chapter, yay me! Anyways, I wonder what Paige and Braden fought about that got her so upset. Also, is Paige and Damien going to date? My intuition, woman intuition I might add, thinks so, or I could be wrong. My intuition isn't so reliable. I'm sorry that I'm blabbing. I'm just so excited about this story!

Well I barely finished this chapter once I read the Pablo laughed sentence, no man on man for me thank you. A weird contrast though, lots of detail and kind of boring and I was confused of the gender and name of the main character and then boom a random sentence and twist of "Pablo is dead". Uber short, I don't really think you need the spanish vocab at the bottom but eh. Overall perfect grammar and description that could battle against Chuck. That's a compliment; keep at the chapters, for now.

Wow wow I love this story, and Paige. I just enjoy neurotic people. But don't get me wrong I love Damien too.

This story rocks! I will be checking out the next chapter.

I always like a story that promises something or another about a bunch of teens and a freaky sanatorium. I dunno, the combination give me goosebumps. And the name Sloan is creepy enough to get me thinking about ax murderers and such. I love the descriptions, you guys did a good job.

-L

I have to say, I love the fact that you didn't use "I", yet kept it in first-person. Very hard to due, but very well done. I'm looking forward to the next chapter. You've got me hooked!

- Koki