I liked the story until the last 2 words; the even-death-is-better-than-this theme is just so overdone. To me, the perfect ending is at the sentence "hoping this time he will end it." There, that's it. You still have the same conclusion, but without the obvious cliched phrase.

You wrote in present tense successfully, so you deserve a pat on the back for that! (I couldn't write in present tense fluently even if my life depended on it. . .)

Anyway, I really liked it. I looked through your profile, and your other stories are one-shots as well. Will you be writing any full-fledged stories here? If so, I'd love to read it!

Nice work, and keep it up!

- Koki