So, her mom knew she was going to die...?

why did she scream in the previous chapter? 2 lazy 2 log in. Just PM me.

Just have her tell him to ** off.

so, he's sleeping with one person, and was trying to sleep with another? perv.

would she really just talk about it like that? And you don't mention how she feels before then... might want to add that in somewhere.

and THAT's her biggest problem? not, like, being stalked/raped by an ex?

ooh. duh nuh nuh nuh.

her dad would have called her. What about the funeral and stuff?

wait. What?

First of all, her mom died. Wouldn't her dad have called her? they may not have been close, but...

and how did she die?

Wow. You updated. Amazing.

in-tra-sting.

but why isn't he in jail for manslaughter?

anyway, this sentance bugged me; "By the surname.” He stopped, and I waited for him to continue"

no one uses a word like 'surname' in the US. He'd say 'last name'.

WTF? YOU ARE ABANDONING THIS STORY AT THE CRUCIAL MOMENT? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU? lol. I read it all at once, and it is pretty good. But why does Nick want her so badly?

and she isn't bleeding and limping and they arn't looking at her funny?

is she naked?

more emotions, like I said.

you need a few more emotions in that scene. like, isn't she scared out of her mind, for example? you should mention that.