I loved the part about the Spirit. It's like when you feel it's presence, you are willing to do whatever it takes for that overwhelming feeling you get to stay forever; like you become addicted to the warming, invisible embrace.

Perfect.

I like what you are saying, but the words are a bit confusing... Not bad, but you switch time frames at one point, and there is one part that is a little too wordy. I hope I don't sound harsh! I have this problem with being a little too critical. Here are my ideas for this piece, you don't have to change a thing though...

You see that when you forgive

It won't be the last time for this sin

What I want to do, I don't do

And what I don't want to do, I do


Here is what I would make this...


You know that when you forgive me,

It won't be the last time I sin.

I want what I can't have,

And have what I don't need.


Here is where you change time points of view...

I fall into its trap

Then shamfully hide from you.

Lord, I am your prodigal son


Here is what I would say...

I fell into its trap,

Then I shamfully hid from you.