This gave me this thrill... I dunno... speechless really. In a good way ;)

This was good. I loved the antithesis in the third line, and the image of 'playground of voices' was vivid, yet it was a bit... ominous... if you know what I mean? The format of this was really good too.

As to concrit: I didn't 'get' the part of the second line 'and breath' Is the love curling into her breath? In the 3rd line I didn't really like the use of 'stroking', it contrasted too much with the image of 'scorching ice'; in the 4th line I felt the word 'race' was a bit bland and out of place. I didn't really understand the 8th line...

Anyways, I really liked this.

-Silence, courtesy of The Roadhouse

Wow. She's running right? I loved the descriptions and everything about it. I especially liked: "toes wrapped in too-loose shoes to cement-stained/ground..." It was brilliant.