Hey! I really like the idea for your story, and how it's written. But maybe you should use paragraphs and line spacing...it's really hard to read otherwise and usually I skip stories that aren't properly laid out like that. So maybe you should edit that a bit? Otherwise I totally love your story up 'till now!!

Hm...After reading the last two chapters (which were such a fun read, by the way), there's only one thing I have an issue with.
The betrothal. Um. There's something odd about how it came about...I think there would be more drama if they all found out about it before they knew each other. Because then there would be that automatic dislike for one another--and grow into love through the different events they would be pressured through.
Like, Ray wouldn't like Monroe (as she is now) because she would be forced to marry him, but Monroe would dislike the situation before seeing her, and then stop being so pessimistic about it once he saw her. Joey would be pissed too, along with Jacob, and then TADA! They're love birds. Well, that's just how I visioned it to be more... dramatic.
Their reactions right now to it seem a little...off.
But I still love the way all of them are interacting--even if it is a bit odd. xD Good update, do again soon! :)

Aw, Bobby is so cute. I love the Monroe&Ray pair. I don't feel like I know enough about Jacob, other than he likes Joey's music, though.
Even though not a lot of stuff has happened yet, I'm loving reading this story! I hope you update soon!

I love the dialogue! It's definitely your forte. ;) Throws me into a fit of giggles every time. xD

Helloo! I'm back! Did you miss me? Lol. Kidding!
[There were nine of them. Nine.] BAHAHAHAHA! Poor her...but any sane, hormonal girl would give an arm and a leg to be in her shoes. xD
[She felt as though she had just been thrown to the lions.] Oh, dear. She's the meat, isn't she? Lol.
[“Her hair is pink.” Monroe said in surprise.
“Yes it is.”
“Why is it pink?”] Lol. This interaction made me laugh.
[“JOEY!”
“Huh? What Ray?”
“Joey! They’re all over the place!!”
“What?” She was too tired to deal with her sister this early.
“They’re everywhere!”
“WHAT RAY?”
“Guys.”
“Guys?”
“Yes, it’s like we went to the twilight zone. They’re taking over!”
“No, we’re just staying with Vanessa and Marc McCarroll.”
“Vanessa and Marc who?”
“McCarroll, they’re old friends of mom. They have nine sons.”
“Nine? Nine? Are they… Hold on! Where’s mom?”
“Russia.”
“What the hell?”
“She eloped to Russia with some guy she met?”
“Russia?”
“Yes, so we’re staying here until she gets back.”
“Russia?”
“Yes Ray.”
“Nine?”
“Yes”
“Nine of them?”
“Yes!” She was getting exasperated.
“Nine?”
“Ray shut up.”] Rofl! Why do I get the feeling that every time Ray opens her mouth, I'll laugh? xD
[“Do you know about the hair gnomes?”] Lol. Nice. I wish hair gnomes made my hair pretty in the morning! xD

Helloo! The writing in this is easy to read (which is a good thing) and I'm liking the way you're directing the story line. Just a few CC's!
[She was beautiful with her dark curly hair and pale skin. She felt insignificant with her suntanned skin and light hair.] I think it would work better if you said she was 'exotically' beautiful, or something extra to that effect. Because Joey might feel insignificant, but she's still pretty too. Just a different type, right? So if you distinguish those differences, it would add to the description. :D
[“All you have to do is ask nicely. It does wonders!”] Hahaha! So true! People underestimate the powers off being nice. xD
[Joey and Ray as everyone called them were twins with matching blonde hair and gray eyes and tall slim figures. ] I think the way you transition in their appearances is abrupt. It would work better if you stuck in their descriptions through their actions. That way it sticks better in the readers mind. Like "Joey's shoulder-length, choppy blonde hair blew furiously around her face with the wind streaming through the open window. She had a hard enough time keeping her bangs out of her face when she was standing on flat ground. It could get irritating at times when she was playing [insert sport here].
Peering suspiciously at her mother's green car with her gray eyes through black tinted sunglasses, she couldn't help but feel a bit skeptic of where they were headed." Well, you get the idea. That's just rough attempt. ;)
[She shook her head while Joey began to silently fume.] I like that line. I can see exactly what her facial expressions--even her stance would be like just by saying she was silently fuming. :D
[She looked at her mother and felt like crying. She looked so hopeful that she couldn’t possibly tell her no. She was her mother and she had done so much for her.
“Fine.” She said, resigned.] I think she should put up more of a fight. She seems like somebody who would do that. And if she really does just love her mother THAT much, then drawl that scene out a bit longer. I don't think it's got enough description or dialogue for being the initial incident scene. Reader's gotta know that that's when it all started...dun dun dun!! Lol.
["...Like ripping a band aid off.”] Great imagery! And it brings out Vanessa's personality at the same time! xD
Overall, I like it. I'm off to read the next chapter! :D