hey it's me agen but i cant help it..
i like this one too i guess becoz
i love nature and anything to do
with it that it just connects with me anyway
the bits i love is when you describe the surroundings
like the mist and stuff it reminds me of the rainforest
...so thanx alot for writing stuff like this
:D :D :D

"Her breathing fast," I think there needs to be a comma between breathing and fast

I like the phrasing of this, it works really well. I also like how it looks, it's visually appealing. The whole idea of running to deal with pain is one I personally don't understand (i hate exercise), but you explained it really well. The rhyming also worked well, not forced. Nice job.

PS If you're bored check out the Review Game and/or the Review Marathon (link in my profile).