Impressively creepy! I felt very 'in' the poem as I read it.

April Fool review:

This is beautifully creepy, and horrifically sad.

It pretty well much sums up the reasons why I plan to be dead by 70 at the latest - just to avoid becoming the person you describe here.

That's how I interpreted it anyway - being stuck living a life that's not worth living.

I don't know if that's what you intended.

"Chained to a heartbeat that ceased to exist long ago." The imagery here is beautiful. It makes me think of a person who walks silently in a room, and hopes to feel the 'presence' of their recently-deceased lover.

Keep writing. Keep trying new things. You have so much potential :D!

-Isca

Erm, remember that thing I wrote about soul borrowing?

Yeah. um... you just did it.

GIVE ME THAT BACK! you fiend!

haha. jk.

Lurved it!

So sad, kind of EdgarAllenPoeish, but haunting. Inspiring. "Chained by a heartbeat" - yeah, THAT is going to stick with me for a while.

-Lily

Funny how you seem so cheerful in your homepage yet you can write something so strong and deep. Good job. :)

*opens and closes mouth repeatedly*...I think this is so...descriptive, I have to admit it made me shudder a little, but I could litterally see me walking through a house just feeling an emptiness and just a sadness swept over me almost. what I mean, is that, it just...wow...its awesome, and I really don't know what to say.

Nicely done. It's very haunting, especially in the way you begin the poem. I love the mention of the "still beating heart" sort of describing the life of the dwelling slipping out.

Loved it..Flowed beautifully ;) I like the description used as well.