I like the deep symbollism in this poem. Very well written.

Nice piece, well written :)
Faith

i really like the metaphor here. while it's not the most original, it doesn't matter because it fits. i like the rhyme scheme. it flows nicely. overall, nice job!

A short but sweet poem. It builds up with no surprises, but doesn't disappoint at the end either.

The pattern is simple but it creates a great connection with the reader. It wouldn't work well for a larger poem, but it works well here.

Overall the poem feels like a song. Which isn't necessarily bad, but I felt that that consistent pattern almost seemed to take away from the poem, rather than add to it. It would have been idea if the flow of the poem could have been used to emphasize certain points or words.

It's a great poem which feels very polished off, but another push would shoot it into excellence.