I love the way the opening chapter flowed like poetry. You had this seamless way of introducing us to the scene, the main character, the boy and keeping it flowing with interest the whole time. I like how sad Audrey is, how bitter, it really grabs you. My favorite line concerning the sky: "It was the only thing I liked about this town and it was already gone."

I have no idea where this is going, I can't even guess from the summary, which is maybe part of what I found interesting about this. I'm not sure. But I like it so far.

Wow it's been so long I forgot what even happened but I'm so glad you updated. This is one of my favorite stories so far. I just hate that I can't read it all in one take

Just to let you know, this line:

"I almost collapsed into the plush passenger seat, but I was my mother's daughter, so I calmly slid in."

Has made me a dedicated reader.

Just when I thought there was nothing worthwhile on FP anymore...

This is an interesting story that I just stumbled upon. You have a great style of writing and I love how descriptive you are. I look forward to reading more!

I like how Audrey's voice is so subtle. It seems like you don't give her personality, but you do. It's just so subtle. I like it, cos it's so sinister that way. Austine's a weird little thing, isn't she?

I loved the last two words! And for a moment before i read those, I felt kinda scared. It was creep. Um, umz. Oh, and the smiley face you put in below really topped it off. I'm glad you did that. I approve. ^.^

So don't leave us for such a long time again! Kay? I really missed this story. And I swear, before you updated, today i just skimmed over a few chapters of Eden. It's seriously weird how that happens.

update soon.
love.

Seriously, you need to update. Now. I'm all anxious now.

update soon...wan to know waht happends

man oh man♥, do i owe you the most awesometastic review ever. checked my review history which has been incognito since january (kinda like this story ... jk) and noticed that the last time i reviewed was in 2008 D:
like DAMN. so, i have so catching up to do.
but anyways, im supposed to be reviewing the story.
its kind of a mindeff to come back to a story after being away so long, so i had to reread the last chapter, which was just as fanastic as i remember
(and rocking my rainbow toe socks clad feet as well)
i sometimes hate knowing the answers to questions because some things are best left unknown (well, unless it's a test that i didnt study for, then pass me those answers please :D)
i guess i should follow the old saying, ask me no questions and hear no lies hm?
it seems like audrey likes to/needs to be in charge, needs to have things in order. or else.
her writing in the journal, was she writing about kath?
i want to think she is, but the writing, seems so ...
it seems like it'd have to do with kath, but not exactly. some truth and none at all basically.
or maybe all truth.
id be wary too if someone just randomly walked in sync with me. especially chelsea.
idk, there's something about them (mainly austine&chelsea) i just don't like.
or maybe it's just because of how audrey makes them seem.
to me, they seem fake. like they're holding back with her.
although, she's holding back with them and they probably know it, so i guess in a sense, it would seem fair to not put yourself exactly out there.
i wonder what she thinks audrey could possibly be up to?
it truly is so pretty during fall, NOT that i would know with all the rain and the grey cloudy skies ]X
but i heard this week should be sunny, so its good (for now mother nature)
chelsea seems like the mother of the group; the nurturer, the protecter.
i dont know why, but randy's diner makes me think of ihop pancakes, which is heavenly and so good but too far away and how'd i never eat the lunch/dinner stuff because me and ihop are strictly on a breakfast kind of relationship
and apparently thats as much as i can review cause FP is all leave some words for the rest of the reviewers
and im all w'ever FP and you're 10 max. words i like to ramble SO i bid you adieu, even though im not french.
but i would be if french fries were actually french because i eat those fried potatoe slices like it's the last thing i'll do XD
♥ forgive? :)

I like the dialogue - interesting and good pacing. Again, good suspense. I like how things are coming together, even with the little details and clues you provided.

Corrections:

{I remembered reading something like that that in an article last year for school.} "like that that" - I think it's supposed to be "like that."

{I wasn't high on the idea of people knowing about my family, even though it was Jayden and he probably didn't give a damn about the whole the drama/gossip circuit — he didn't seem like the type to contribute to it... but then again, you never really know.} "the whole the" - I think it's supposed to be "the whole."

{I smiled slightly; the angled it the tight, pressed way my mother did.} "the angled it the tight" - this confused me.

I like your writing. Your lucky you haven't alienated me by just using short sentences like "The sun was bleeding" throughout the whole story. There's long sentences too, and that's the saving grace :):)

I won't say your writing style is unique-becoz I've definitely read this style before (Hotkitty) but credit is due, when your plot seems original and VERY interesting. I admit, your first 13 chapters interested me more than the first 13 chapters of any of HK's stories-- so if you keep up thus far, you WILL do well :) With stories like these, it's all about the ending.

Update soon, okay?

Not as long as the last, but that's okay. The content makes up for it. I loved the last sentence, before the italics. It was unexpected considering her character. Her flaws and screwy-ness make her human, but this just made her even more human, you know. It was so beautiful and scary. -tear-

I kinda feel more afraid of Audrey than Jayden. Do you know what? Hm, I don't either.

I like the journal. Socool, socool. The italics part was nice too. I was wondering what happened back there on the cliff. I was kinda concerned you weren't gonna tell us. But then that wouldn't make sense, would it?

Update soon.
lovelovelovelovelo-
i'll stop.

You're a hundred steps above nearly every wart on this site in your writing skills, but your narrator's so disinterested and woe-is-me about EVERYTHING. It's irritating enough that I don't want to continue reading. Unless, of course, she changes during the progression of the story.

Update soon please!!

Creepy!

Your writing style is really good!