I liked that it was a unique way of writing, I never really read any screenplay or plays on Fp. And personally i like that you added song selections to set the mood. Even though the dialog was good you really should add more to catch the reader's attention. For example in between the dialog more details.

Like a screenplay, eh? Well, I think it's awesome. It can be hard to make a story interesting with just dialogue alone, but this was way more than interesting. A bit whacked, but in good way. All the characters were so unique.

:)

- Koki