Lol, I liked this story, kinda relates to our normal antics nowadays right? Hahaa update soon woman!

Funy. :D

hi,

Great story.

Okay, for pointers...

-"There has been" should be "There have been"

-"several things black" could be "several black things"

-"little Blonde hobbit" ...the 'b' doesn't need to be capitalized

-"on their ass?" you should probably use 'his', because you've already established that the young master is a boy

-“that’s the only thing ugly could be "that's the only ugly thing"

-"Then, she turned to Lucas"... this phrase is kind of weird, because Eaving has already stated that she can't remember his name, and so we generally know him as The Dell

So, mostly, just watch for punctuation, capitalization, and word order. Other than that, it's very enjoyable! Please keep writing!

i fucking love the story!
cant wait for more!
hope you update soon!
--ifly*hugs*

Nice story. Even though you've only posted three chapters, i love Eaving. She's so spunky, feisty, and such a strong character.
I can't wait to read more!

I like the 'corpse city'thing. It just made thei ntro a little more interesting.

Nice job. I'm looking forward to more.

love it love it love it i hope the other chapter will be up soon

Nice!

nice.

the "aiiya" = EPIC WIN.

oh and the whole cultural background, too. ex: the bargaining in sf + parents being proud of that HA. so true. uh anyways, it looks like it's off to a good start, so just keep it up for now. can't wait to see more. (:

I like it ... its different but its cool. Keep writing.

Hhm. Interesting. :)