I love Xin's personality. She's a -person,- it's clear, instead of simply a character. She's got fears, strengths and weaknesses, and a firm grasp of sarcasm.

I might wish that the other characters were developed a bit more, but otherwise it's a great story.

:D CD

This story got better as it went along. You do a wonderful description at the beginning about Xin seducing John. The detail was beautiful and puts the reader right there.

A couple of things. When they go from the modern world to the magical realm, you need to make more to do about it. Is there a different feel or something. You need to be more descritive in this.

The other thing is you shift between presnt tense and past tense often.

Otherwise, I really like the set up you have here. Poor Xin.

Nice! ...waait... Nadiam... Maidan... nope. I thought her name was "Maiden" for a moment.

Anyway, cool.

:) CD

Uhh, did you mean to do that? You posted the entire story in Chapter 6...? and then repeated some stuff at the end.

Excellent... I like Xin more and more.

=D CD

Nice. =D I like it.

:D CD

Though she may regret it in the short run, in the long run they will rue the day they screwed with her.

:) CD

I LOVE this! I've always loved stories that get behind the faerie tale and into the reality of it.

=D CD

-laughing- I like them already.

:D CD

Hahaha, I like it. Interesting idea. Can't wait for the next chapter! :)