This was written very nicely, in my opinion. There were only a few grammar mistakes I caught; but if I were you, I would have put some more commas here and there.

They tried to kill each other, because they thought each other killed their pets? Wow. Anyway, I really liked it, and quick question. Did Zion die at the end?

Anyhow keep up the great work, and if you could review some of my writing, that would be great.