|Reviews for You're Majesty|
| rolliepollie44 8/13/09 . chapter 1
Aww, This one's a lot lighter then HTR.
It's a lot sweeter. :D
I really liked the ending stanza, espeically the last line, that really brought together the whole idea of the poem. . I also enjoyed how you threw in all these different feelings you get and how you react during them. This is really perfect for the love catagory, it just describes exactly what love or lust really is, nicely done! :D
| nothing.void.gone 3/28/09 . chapter 1
Something about either the diction or how this was grammatically structured made it a tiny bit difficult to read smoothly. Something kept throwing me off; it was almost as if the speaker in the poem kept getting cut off before they were finished.
I also think the rest of the poem could have been tied to the 'Your Majesty' theme more. The connection of the title to the rest of the piece just seems lacking, because it was related in the first stanza, and then not mentioned after that.
Good effort :]
| Skittles94 1/6/09 . chapter 1
I know exactly what you are talking about! This explains it in a way that I never thought to. I could never find the words to say what I felt, and this is exactly how it should be said. I love it!
| WonderWing 10/15/08 . chapter 1
The mood is solid, the descriptions are understandable and clear, but it does seem to read a little too much like stacked incomplete sentences. I think it's because the only pattern or repetition in the whole poem is the incompleteness of the lines, something I just can't get into, myself. Even freestyle poetry is a little more random than this, ya know? A whole sentence here, a fragment there; using inconcistency as the pattern is key sometimes.
Great lines in here, though, very clear translations from feeling to paper. I especially liked, 'Because I need you/ In every sentence/ Of my life's story' that was classic man. 'I'd near panic and feel/ A semi-pleasant/ Nauseousness fill me.' Very vivid. In fact, I don't know if it was just that line or not but I actually have a stomach ache now lol.
| Se7en Storey Reason 9/22/08 . chapter 1
So relatable.. good wording.