 sunscraped. 2008-10-03 . chapter 1This poem didn't really speak to me; parts of it reminded me of TV ads for voting for measure x or y.
For talk of a revolution, it's not quite provocative enough to live up to its name.
It had a few good points in there, though, considering the silence being bliss (yet there's counterpoints to that - breakdown of communications ≠ bliss as we've seen in so many relationships).
I think overall it's a rough start, but it's got some good foundation to build up into a good poem with some polishing.
- ss. |