this is beautiful and realistic and honest.
i've read this piece a few times; i can't get enough of the metaphors and the adjectives.

i'm eager to read the next installation.

i am in love with your writing.
this is amazing.
i absolutely love this part : "She likes that sated, victorious smirk that curls over his lips and half-moon eyes." i don't hear/read words like those very often, and you just put them into this in such a natural, perfected way that just stuns me.
i want to someday be as great a writer as you.

gorgeous, I love it. you always have really poignant pieces. love the POV and the little pieces of her personality that we see shine through.

Oh, I really like this. I think the fact that you wrote this as someone else looking in [3rd person specifically] was the right way to go. It made this less overdone and added an abstract feel, sort of. Also, I love the beginning. It's like the start of a tale that you just HAVE to read. Nicely done.

-Dee, from the Review Marathon.
[Check up on it. Link's in my profile.]