You changed so much in this story and I like it. I like that you're letting the relationship become more rounded. If there is any way that you can send me more chapters in this story, then that would be awesome!

I like the change in Blaise's character in this one. He seems more human in this one. I would love to read more of this story. I know you're going to wind up putting it on your other site but I would really love to read more because this is great.

good story. I just read the original crave so I am having a little trouble liking this one more cause I got so attached to the other and this is so different. please update again soon! i am excited to see where you take this :)

UPDATE ASAP! YOUR STORY IS AWESOME!

Christ, I have a lot to learn about writing.

This is amazing. It's got me hooked. You know what you're doing, and you do it well. This story needs published. Seriously. Once it's been finished, it'll be golden. Complex and well-rounded characters, few grammatical errors, great plot, excellent structure.

Blaise is attractive, even without a visual. Faye is so conflicted, so uncertain, so terrified (and rightly so), and I feel like I can relate to her, to a degree. The only thing that bothered me was the chloroform scene. I think I would (attempt to) tear Blaise a new one for that, were I lucky enough to be in Faye's shoes.

Good luck in school. I don't know where you are with it, but I graduate in 20-something days. Then I wait a few months for my term to start at Harrisburg Area Community College. Just try to finish strong, that's all I can say. I wish I could rewind and fix the grades I screwed up in the beginning.

You seem like someone who'd be fun to roleplay with. Check my profile out if interested.

Can't wait for more!

Oh wow. I like this version a whole lot more. The other really did leave me wondering why she stayed with him hehe Thanks for the better version. I really can't wait for an update, school is nearly over now isn't it? Unless you have summer school or attend the summer courses at uni. Anyway I do very much so look forward to reading more of this. Keep up the great work :)

Wow, I really like this story. Blaise is just an okay character for me, but I really like Faye. She's very believable when put into these intense situations. Update soon!

BTW, can you read and review my story Lupus in return? I need the feedback and some new readers badly, and

Amazing chapter as usual. I like where you're taking the story this time along.

Hey, Friggin Awesome chapter!
I feel so sorry for Faye though.

Great chapter! Sucks she had to be kidnapped but it makes sense.

I like that you cut out the kinda useless high school drama and I can't wait for an update!

bravo. this is really quite better than the original. actually the original's prologue almost made me stopped reading, but i am a sucker for romance so i continued, but it was extremely rushed and very impractical even for a demon story. i mean Faye isn't exactly the kind of girl to let a random boy into her house but in this version at least they had dinner.
although in this version, your detail really bothers me, for the most part it is fine but in the beginning it was terribly overdone and there was other times, such as the diner scene, where you over described it, you broke the flow of the story to describe. Really if you had just mentioned something like, they walked into a (insert adjective such classic or old checkered style) diner, mot readers would be able to conjure up what they think the diner looks like. Really there are specific words that trigger images in the reader's mind and as an author it can be hard to know how much description is enough, but usually a line or two will do. Not an entire paragraph.
I think your dialogue also improved greatly, before I became confused as to who was talking but this time you described the tone graciously and it wasn't confusing at all.
You characters also have much more personality in this story, in the other they were sort of bland and stereotypical but now, such as Allister, you see more of a realistic view.
I really like your story and look forward to reading more.

I haven't read the original version of this so I can't comment on any differences, but I thought this was well-written and I enjoyed it. Your characters were well-rounded and even with just a few chapters you have provided some interesting plot twists.
There were some minor grammar mistakes in the first chapter that threw me: " Her hand drifted towards my leg where it rested firmly on my thigh" has a misplaced modifier and should probably be something like " Her hand drifted towards my leg and rested firmly on my thigh." Likewise, "Her wrist was fashioned with a twenty one and under bracelet to identify her age" should probably be "twenty and under."
I liked the plot but there were a couple of scenes that bore an uncanny resemblance to those in other supernatural-themed novels. I think you are a gifted writer and it would be great to see where your originality could take this storyline. Perhaps adding in characters from another genre of film or literature that you enjoy, or giving one of your characters an unusual hobby, could show off your creativity and make your story even more distinctive.
All in all, this is a well-written piece of work and I'm interested to see where you take the story from here.

i loved the original crave! it was amazing! i like that this one has the characters expressing themselves a bit more than the other, but i feel like something is wrong. it kinda feels like they are being to obvious in their thoughts. i've read and re-read crave many many times and blaise and faye don't seem right. faye seems like... almost an airhead? i can't really describe it. i think airhead might be the wrong word buti can't think of anything else. blaise seems like his confidence and assurence are way down. he seems kinda like a creepy stalker, not the self-assured guy that is crossing the line into arogance. maybe i'm just not far enough into the story but i think it's just a tad off. either way i'm so ahppy there is a new version of crave being written! i'm pretty sure it's gonna rock!

I like that Faye was strong and not a total helpless baby. It's reasonable for her to be shocked after shooting the guy. I also liked that you cut out the high school angsty drama with Samantha and Travis.