 sugarlessgirl 2008-10-27 . chapter 1BRAVO! I like the descriptions a lot and how you took the time to build up the story and let the readere get to know more about the personality of the narrator. I think this is definitely well-written.And I have to admit, that I can relate in a way with kissing strangers haha. Anyway, I noticed that there were a few grammatical errors and omitted words like the fourth paragraph in the second section, "Till this day, I don't what", I think you meant "Till this day, I don't know what"?
I enjoyed this a lot, keep writing~ |