WHEN YOU GAVE ME YOUR USERNAME YOU SPELLED IT WRONG SO I SPENT A LOT OF TIME GETTING MAD THINKING YOU HAD DISAPEARED FROM THE FACE OF THE EARTH! (burst out in tears) (smile) (wave) hello!

First of all, I like your story, but (sorry for the but) I'm not sure if you did it on purpose or not, but Dieing is spelt dying. Unless you actually mean dieing for your story, I haven't read that far ahead yet :)