Very, very cute! I love the characters, the depth of them, they way they talk, everything. Damn, I wish I could write this well!

Thank you, so much for writing this. You made my day. Now, off to write! You have inspired me.

Nice end.

Well, the spatula *could* secretly be a mob boss I suppose.

Livi

Oh, I am so NOT disppointed. *grins* This is great for your first lemon. :) And it was so funny. I don't really care that you took it from your old drafts. It's so great either way. ^^

“No rest for the wicked, I suppose.”
“Or for those being shagged by the wicked.”

Those. Two. Lines. Were. BRILLIANT! I almost died of oxygen deprivation, from the way I laughed so hard.

But I'm curious, who is Fox? Some kid they adopted or something? The idea of that is kind of cute. Now, I wish you could continue it. Will you ever come back to it, or is the idea on permanent hiatus? But, either way, it was nice seeing Trick and Seirus again. ^^ *snuggles them*

I've missed these two! Ah, they are so hilarious. And that game sounds very intriguing... I loved it ^^ And I don't know who Fox is...but I like him! That last bit was utterly perfect XD

I haven't read the original but this was still fun to read. :3 Since I like how you write in general. I speculated how these two relate to the newer version. lol. It was kind of fun. Also, for a first lemon, I thought it was really good o_o

Oh, boys.
much love.
*giggles*
one line, though: “We should really replace get around to replacing everything old.”
I think there's an extra "replace" in there.

Your disclaimer of this being an "attack on a lemon" was a little intimidating to being with, but I must say that if you'd never pointed it out, I don't think I would have known. The intimate scenes are perfect, as far as I'm concerned. All the information needed to get the idea without crossing so far into obscenity that it becomes vulgar. Tastefully done.

I especially like the humor that seems so natural throughout, not at all the forced slapstick that pervades some similar pieces I like otherwise. You're obviously a very naturally talented writer, and you even proofread! Didn't catch a single typo in the whole thing.

I'd certainly add this to my favorites, if not for the content. My more "nubile" readers might not appreciate that :)