I like the idea behind it. Reminds me of the line in Broken Strings - the truth hurts, lies worse.

The repetition is what makes this piece! It drives the point home so well. Without it, the poem would be severely lacking.

The message is sad, but good in a strange way. It caused me to think and examine my own life. Thanks for providing me with the time for a little self-reflection!

i liked the way that each stanza started with the same two lines almost like a song and the way that you chose describe the feelings of love in a clear but not too literal way. but i understood the message behind the poem of heartbreak mixed with love. what i would like to see improved would be a bit was that i felt the third stanza was a little too obvious with the beautiful eyes.
nice poem in all.

i think it has alot of peotential that hasn't been reached yet. that would be my dislike about this piece. it's not the best that it could be

i do however like the concept. i like the repitition of "the way you forgot my name didn't hurt as bad as the way" because it emphasizes that that is the least of her worries.

Hey there, NotMyShoes reporting from The Review Game.

The concept and meaning behind this was good and I liked it a lot, probably because I can sort of relate to it, and the diction you've chosen conveys the theme very well. If you are going back and editing, I would focus on the way you break up the lines. There are certain parts where it feels like you should shift the last word of a line down or the first word up. Also, and this is probably just my opinion, but I'd change the title to be more relevant to the content of the poem.

Good work, though!

Strangely enough, the lack of editing lends it a bit of realism that adds ot the heartbreak of this piece. I wouldn't change it, personally.

-Stardust.

A little confusing, maybe, but I like it. A lot.

I love the repetition of 'the way you forgot my name / didn't hurt as bad as the way'. It's like it's contradicting itself - the repetition makes it seem as though it DID hurt as bad, maybe more.

I also like the line on its own at the end. It makes it more significant and emphasises the point you've been building up to through the whole poem.

=]

-Amy