|Reviews for The Most Perfect|
| V.V 12/30/08 . chapter 3
"Being a man myself ..." Well, the subject of this remark sounds a bit like a frat boy, now does he not? We could also bring in parent-investment theory. Sorry, too much college memories ... On to the review:
Aww, consumptives can be appealing.
Um, well, bored luxury is the only way to live.
Yeah, this chapter was very entertaining and short, so nothing really helpful in the way of criticism. Sorry. You could make it longer? I do not know. But honestly, it is fine as itt is. Good luck. I do not know if I shall be able to read over your material in the future. Next semester promises to be more fun than the last, so ... Later then.
| V.V 12/30/08 . chapter 2
Okay, this is a stylistic issue. They taught us never to use those existential apositive phrases. Ex. "Being the only daughter of Lawrence Clitherow and ..." It is to be found in the first paragraph. I agree with the seemingly arbitrary rule since you can reword without using "being." You could say: "The only daughter of ..."
Oh, the ton, the lovely, glittering, irritating English haute ton. And not irritating because of anything in your story. I just can not stand it in general. Much prefer the French beau monde.
Gentlemen? Ha-ha. That word takes on new connotations when one meets a young man from America's finest fraternities.
"... eyes flew to the clock on her fall." May you mean "wall" perhaps?
| Vixen of Vienna 12/30/08 . chapter 1
Sorry-too lazy to log in properly. But we do have what looks like to be an interesting story. I like the gray-eyed, blonde-haired aspect of our hero; it reminds me of another character. (cough, cough) Anyways, you decided to give him the French disease, an unusual choice since the medical history on it is varied and mixed, though still entertaining to read. Otherwise, we have a very sound prologue. I am off to read the next installments.