Well it was interesting seeing everyone's life after Yuki could control his power. It me get to feel more for the characters that I already knew, and I started to take a liking to more (including Ayumi :P). Which makes me starts to think that Yuki is interested in Ayumi... or is just my imagination. Anyway still loving your story and just gonna keep reading more!

Yuki finally became a man! And it seems that his powers are a whole lot stronger than expected. Good to see that Yuki doesn't need to depend on anyone anymore for protection. I wonder what's going to happen now that Yuki can control his powers. This story is still great and I hope it keeps getting better as I go along!

Another 20 chapters down! It took me longer than usual to read and review it this time cause I had stuff to do. Well lots of stuff went on and I have to say my favorite event out these twenty was the whole Seiji thing. It really let me see what the relationship were like before the actual series. I pleased with everything that happened so far, and Yuki continues to grow on me. I'm still lovin your story, and I'll continue reading this great story!

Okay 21 chapters down only 126 chapters to go!... Man I still have way to much ready, but my mind needs to rest or it will blow up! I have no idea how you've managed to write 147 chapters, but I'm glad you did as I now have something to keep me occupied for the next couple of days or weeks. Just sort of telling you right now I'm going to review once every 20 chapters or around there because I'm no where close to being done reading this giant story.

Anyway, I'm really like your story so far. The only character I honestly I can say that I like as of this point is Saki. Yuki is starting to grow on me, but other than that other than Ayumi who irritates me occasionally no one else so far I can say that I like or hate. That being said your story seems very Shonen, but I have this feeling that your going to take this Shonen story and turn it into a great Shonen I hope. Nothing really other to say as of this point other than your story is great and interesting and I hope it continues to draw me in more as I read along! So that being said please keep up the great work and update soon or not, I already have enough to read! :P I'll see you in 20 more chapters!

Ok so i shall point out a couple of mistakes if i find any. These two are in the same paragraph.

"It was difficult to tell, but if closely stared (I mentally added an at here when first read it so you might want to add an at here) it he actually had very dark blue hair rather than the typical black that most Japanese did."

"The contrasting light brown eyes he had blinked one more time before he stepped forward to wake up the rest of the way."(this sentence didnt make sense the first couple of times i read it. Therefore i think it should be like this: He had contrasting bright brown eyes which he blinked once more time in the mirror. This helped him to remove all remnants of sleep before stepping into the daylight. This makes a little more sense if youre not happy with it then my mum read it with emphasis and it made sense so you could just put in a clause here instead))

Still very good so far. Do you write this in a notebook or on the computer? I have been noticing a few mistakes within each chapter do you want me tyo scrutinise these and point them out so then your chapters can be perfecty? Let Me Know.

Thanks,

(Ben)

Great first chapter

A Little Confused about the prologuey bits as you talk about Awakening? What are you on about because i cant find anything?

Thanks

Amazingly written, you have a great way with words! I'm enthralled by it and eager to read more!

Keep being inspired,

O.

Wow it's been awhile but I still remember the gist of this story (guess you're just one of those writers who leaves an impact on somebody) and it's greatly improving.

The two things I might criticize are the huge description on Ayumi's uniform. We've got a whole paragraph just dedicated to what she's wearing, that's a little bit of over-kill personally. Then again that is my opinion.

The other is minor Yuki, Yumi and Ayumi... Wahhhh too amny Y's, U's and I's . That's just a tiny bit confusing. This might be subverted though as I have watched Rumiko Takahashi's fire tripper with Shukumaru, Shu, Suzu and Suzuko. Even though that had plot relevance I myself try to limit the characters that have too much of the same letters.

Anyway overall awesome job and loving the drama, but with cliff hangers I have to warn you SO many authors use that instead of ending instead of sprinkling cliff hangers through stories and using them as an actual ending rather than the plot devices that they are so easy does it.

Well Ja Ne for now SanjiandSerea.

If you wish to review me back do on chapter one of Gobou Doujou Otome. (And don't worry about how much time it takes it's not a track and field event :))

This is a decent piece.

This is a really good story!

So we return to the school life scenes. A welcome relief after the intensity of the previous arc, I must say. This time the transition doesn't feel too forced and sudden, maybe because the scene with Tamotsu at the end of the previous chapter had a sort of "it's not over yet" feel to it...

As for this chapter, I did feel like it dragged a little in the middle with everyone wandering around looking for the shop, but otherwise the characters interactions were just fantastic - you clearly have a good handle on each of these characters and they really do feel like teenagers. This is probably the first time such a large cast has gotten involved into things, too, rather than just two or three characters at a time. A welcome change; the story's scope is definitely widening. Although I don't know exactly what's going to happen. This Mi Hana place seems intriguing...and I can't help but suspect that it's, a, well, disreputable establishment. Making fantasies come true...XD But that's probably not the case. In any event, I'm reading on to find out.

Well! Quite a bombshell at the end! So this arc isn't wrapped up so neatly...it will clearly have a lot of repercussions in the future. Perhaps even tie to the main plot...but now I'm just aimlessly speculating.

I was surprised to see you continue exploring Chiharu's fragile psychological state into this chapter, though it makes sense - it's not something that can be fixed by just one hug, after all. It's the right decision to continue exploring it. Chiharu really has been messed up from being raised to be an assassin.

And Saki, good old Saki...I love her more and more. Although I admit I don't much understand the scene where she looks upon the sleeping Yuki and apologizes.

I'll keeping reading!

Well...that did not pan out like I expected, I have to admit, although I figure I should stop expecting things by now. XD I am hoping for a little more explanation about the attackers in future chapters, though.

Chiharu's emotional conflict is well-played - powerful and wrenching without being cheesy. I really like how you deal with the negative side of becoming a ninja/assassin, which is something that is usually just glamorized or completely ignored (I'm lookin' at you, Naruto...). I would even call Chiharu's upbringing abusive. Constantly telling a kid that they can't show any emotions is no way to encourage healthy psychological development. And it explains quite well why Chiharu is as messed up as she is. It makes perfect sense that Saki would be the one to help Chiharu out of that state; you've been contrasting and comparing the two ever since they met, and here we get to see the bigest difference between them: Saki's strength comes from her emotions. From her care and devotion for her friends.

Tamotsu and Haruo, I admit, are mysteries at this point and I still don't really understand their motivations. Haruo's especially. I'd have liked to see a little more about the execution scene and would have liked to see you delve a little deeper into the ramifications about killing another human being, but admittedly that's a very specific narrative kink of mine.

Reading on!

I'm back for another round of reviewing. Sorry for taking so long.

Whoa, ninjas! I hadn't expected to see that in Shift. Though it makes sense, given that you're taking on so many shonen cliches already.

This chapter definitely represents a welcome upping in the intensity. It's just one rush, rising and building up, creating excitement...I can't phrase it right. It's strange because there's not that much action in it, but the atmosphere - an unknown enemy attacking in the middle of the night - and the emotion conflicts, especially about killing and revenge, help create a lot of tension. I particular enjoy the revenge element. It's one that a lot of shonen address, yeah, but not very satisfactorily. I think it works in this case because you've already established Yuki and Saki as characters who do not kill and have not killed, so they don't come across as self-righteous hypocrites when they react with horror at Chiharu's revenge quest. And the fact that Yuki has personal experience with those kinds of feelings adds a lot of depth to his characters and makes his speech somewhat less preachy than it could have been.

Great job, and I'll keep on reading.