I sense a but...

You have captured your thoughts and feelings very well, but I do sense an incompleteness to the picture. Just a sense.

You have a good understanding of the mind and dreams and are able to covey that very well throughout the first nine lines

good job

I love the subject matter. It's so pure, so real, so achingly vibrant. Brilliance at its best!

I think my heart broke. This poem is so incredibly moving and real.

"But being a fool isn’t as hard as knowing you’ve squandered a rare heart." THE PAIN! What a beautiful line, though. It's art, my friend. Glorious! This line is: "a cold and broken 'Hallelujah.'"

"The way I made you feel still makes you shake." A heart that is afraid of true love and all of its wonder. Now THERE'S an interesting idea!