|Reviews for By My Side|
| Needa S 1/11/09 . chapter 2
The Bible is a great road map for the lost. Anyhow, the story is great and I hope you continue it soon. Thanks for the kind review. God bless and write on.
| May Elizabeth 1/11/09 . chapter 2
I like how you ended this in a cliffhanger. I think you should describe the scenery and the characters. Show us don't tell us. This is a good start though. Peace.
| May Elizabeth 1/9/09 . chapter 1
This sounds intresting so far. It would be intresting to see how you turn your dream into a short story. Peace.
| Savella 1/7/09 . chapter 1
Holy cow, you're making it into an actual story! That's amazing! I can't wait to read the darn thing, because it's going to be great!
| wynative02 1/7/09 . chapter 1
I'd sure like to see where this story leads, however, just as a suggestion, try to get into a little detail. You're really vague as to whats going on. Ie: 'It was amazing how far God’s adventures had taken them. They had nearly been around the entire world! Not all of it had been pleasant though. Each of them had near death experiences. Now God had led them to an island. They were stranded with nothing but their faith and their Bible.'
your First sentence, "It was amazing how far God's adventures had taken them." Ok and why do I need to know that? It seems important. But you just leave me hanging. My suggestion would go something along the lines of:
It was amazing to reflect on the adventures of God's wonderful world. It was through his good grace, that they were able to see a of wonderful places to include, the Geat Wll of China, and the towering snow capped peaks of Mount Everest. Do you see what I mean? Doesn't it seem clearer? By stating that, you could eliminate the second sentence and it should draw your audience in. At anyrate, good job, and I look forward to reading more.