So I was definitely in the middle of this review, but then I got distracted, so here it is again! I really like the subtle changed you ended up making- some people are just so disgusting. I can't even begin to understand it. But it was very dramatic, and a really good ending. (Again, all biases aside.) And I really liked the note at the end- very clever! Good job!!

Hah. I love how nonchalant he is, at least up at this point. It's like, "Oh! Wait, what just happened...?" So yeah. Lily is turning out to be quite an interesting character ;) We, good job!! (This is usually the length of my reviews. I don't know why the other one was so long...)

Just a little tid bit, but you'll get a few more reviews if you enable anonoymus reviews =). I'm pretty sure that's not how you spell that, but you know what I mean. Anyway. I like this! Of course, you knew this already, but I figured I'd make it official and leave you a pretty review =) So here it is, my pretty review. Hah. Hahaha. Anyway...

So this is cool. I like your writing style, and the fact that it's told in first person. And you cut it off very nicely; when you said that's what you were going to do, I wasn't sure where you'd cut it, but you seem to have cut it well. Woo! I usually don't like these kinds of stories, but you know already that you're rubbing off on me. So you might be changing my views =P

This review is in no way, shape, or form bias =) And this was ridiculously long. So I'm going to stop now... and work on the next two parts! YAY!

I really loved this story. It was thrilling, exciting, dramatic, confusing(in a good way) and well written. There were few grammatical errors but they didn't distract me from reading the rest of the story.
Keep up the good work,
Hypersomnia