Great story so far. I love the way you write (if you didn't know that already) and the way you portray you characters. They are really entertaining. I also love the fact that you didn't just write the typical angel/demon story. Kudos!
There were a few minor errors (missing or repeated words, that kind of thing) here and there but otherwise I really can't find anything to complain about. Please keep writing! :)

Woah!
You have a great gift for prose, my dear! I'm excited to see where this goes! I think it is perhaps the most original idea I have ever read!
Please update soon!
Soon! M'kay? I NEED to find out what happens next!
Oh, and your characters are all very funny. I think it makes the story much more enthralling.

Love,
Fang

Saskia, you are so amazing, become a writer!! Or at least keep writig, you will be doing mankind a disservice if you don't, you know...

grah ADD MORE OR DIE

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha the ending of this ch. is priceless! (oh srry this is bri)

"I'm I am already dead..." ?? haha otherwise SUPER SPECIAL AWESOME!
Hm...it's a life-changing experience...perhaps more imagery or description?
maybe the narrarator could tell the audience that she wasn't afaraid of death? how would you react if you died,as Holly thinks she does? Would she be so calm? I know I would be in hysterics, both tremendously sad and in wonder about the plce I would be in. And relived that I still exist. Sad for family left behind (Holly "died" young, all that school for nothing! a student's worsdt nightmare)
so that's the end of my pointless ramble haha don't mind me :)

(Claps) I cannot begin to tell you how happy I am that you didn't portray the demons with red skin, pointed teeth, and dark. You gave them grace, dignity, and something original. I really look forward to your next chapter.

Lol, good chapter and the last bit was interesting and a nice twist :) still lovein the way she swears by saying toast haha. Update when youcan.

"I cannot believe you’ve been stalking me! Toast, all of you! That’s so incredibly rude!”
That line kills me XD

Interesting plot development. Nice job, I look forward to the next chapter.

Very well written. You don't have the: he said, as he walked through the door, problem. I look forward to your next chapter.

I really liked all four chapters. One thing I look for is the first sentence; if it does not grab me immediately I just don't get into it. The very first sentence yanked me into the story and didn't let go (I think it was the substitute curse words...Very cute!). The entire story is very funny and interesting and the characters were actually fleshed out quite well in the short space. I look forward to reading more of these as they come out. A superb job!

I love the characters so far and the way Holly swears by saying french toast ^_^
Update when ya can cuz it rocks :D

Heheheh. Ver nice, I like. Your character, seems, very amazing. what up with Luther though? Seriously, lend money, stick around to get it back. Not such a hard concept.

"But as I went to check my other pocket, I accidentally bumped a cup sitting on Starbucks’ counter, causing it to spurt a strange pink substance everywhere."

Take out the "but." I think it would sound better.

"Yep. ‘Fraid so, brain, loud and clear.

Brain to foot? Insert into mouth, please."

Dude, take out one of those. It's kind of confusing and you forget about the story when you try to get through that.

"I resisted the urge hold my new bill up to the light and check to make sure it was real since I didn’t know what the heck security features looked like and it was only a five dollar bill anyway and besides that might have seemed rude."

Wow. I dunno if you did that on purpose or what... but that needs some serious fixing if it was accidental.

By the way, you should press enter before you type in what a person is saying every time, it just kinda helps organize it all. I think it's also the correct way to do it... I don't know, your story would just be better if you did that. Wel I really liked your summary, caught my eye. The ending is really good too, I think. You better keep writing.