Wow. i love this one!

Here from the Roadhouse.

This is a clever poem, with the repeated structure of one line saying "I want", the next describing the want and the third modifying it. The third line modifies the expectations DOWN in the first three triples, but refines upwards it in the last one. That is a clever piece of construction as it suggests that the narrator is becoming more positive merely by saying his desires, despite the fact his wants are still plaintive and needy.

This is a good poem, and I like it very much.

Pay it forward.

Very nice work. I really love the way you break your lines in this piece, it creates more of an impact. This is a simple, great, and well-written poem. Fabulous!

This one's got a great way of building up till the end. At first it seemed kind of sad but then the end got like a happy spark to it. The last line was great, ended it very nicely. I enjoy the short lined style in this one, gives it great impact. Amazing. :)

Rolliepollie44