 Nightmareality 2009-02-13 . chapter 1Not bad. I like that it's written as the old lady telling the story to a visitor. I think it was a little too objective, though. It seemed like she was telling a story just like any story, as opposed to telling about her entire family dying one by one, leaving her all alone. And I'm not sure how she'd know that her eyes get red when she's hungry, unless she sits in front of a mirror all the time. Anyway, overall, not a bad job. |