A long prologue?? Are you sure...?? oh well...

It was nice, but it would be better if the readers could've actually seen some action going on. You seem to have a wonderful plot in your head, and a good picture of where you're going... unfortunteately the reader doesn't.

Stil... pretty interesting..
Narq.

"Throughout" is one word though, excluding some minor problems with tense and a few missing words, that's all I can really mention as far as editing goes. You know, you've a bad habit of putting up some really good ideas and never continuing them! Shame on you when it's obvious that those, including myself, who have read the first chapter demand more! As with all your other stories, I insist that this one be continued. The concept is certinly intriguing and I'd love to see how things play out for those of Kyra city. Since there's a promise of dark themes and a chance for the rating to become mature, it would be a real shame for this story to be forgotten. Don't forget it! xG

Another one for my favorites list. This one looks really interesting as well and I love the description that you put into it as well. Update soon! I'll definitely be waiting!

omg 0.0 i look forward to reading more about this story^_^

great job my love-kisses you-