 jack0of0spades 2009-03-06 . chapter 1This is great! I love the rhythm of this piece, your language is just awesome. The only thing that jarred a little for me was reading the line "I'm slipping into your favorite dress", when I sort of stopped short and wondered if this was involving a crossdresser or a lesbian couple. Although I understand the meaning now, it interfered with that wonderful sliding rhythm for me. Awesome poem though!
-J |