ill admit i was confused for a second but your little paragraph at the bottom helped that. anyways i liked it. sucks they were trying to kill her though. lol obviously i don't read emily dickinson...

Wow. This is chilling, incredibly written, and downright compelling. In its simplicity (in structure, anyway), it speaks volumes. There's such depth here.

Wonderful work!

This was really nice. The way that you captured everything in a sort of vague way that gave out hints was really great. And the character Emily is captivating. Though she is easy to relate to for some, she seems hard to understand as well, lol.

Great piece.

C.S.
The Roadhouse

What a fascinating and gripping work! Your Emily is such a compelling character and, maybe it's just me, she's easy to relate to. She someone that I, at very least, could understand. Which is both strange and good. Strange, because I'm not blind nor entirely locked inside of myself. Good, because you're such a talented writer you managed to bring out my empathy.

Keep it up!

The use personification really made this stand out and memorable. It made it different and fantasy-like without using too many words to attempting to do too much - simple but effective.

It's very tense and emotional just as well and the dialogue works just as well.

It's a little vague in terms of what was happening though - it could be explained a bit more - to set that sad mood and add to the feeling of the story. Description would probably help. It can have different interpretations, but that doesn't exactly mean it should be left blank - you could write so it could have multiple meanings, which has partly worked.

That was certainly different. I was fairly confused throughout most of it, but you did say it could be open to different interpretation, which I find really cool--like any way I think about it, it could be different and I wouldn't be wrong. Honestly there could probably be 80,0 different interpretations of this, from what I can tell. :] That's not a bad thing if that's what you're going for. It's different.

Poor Emily. I felt sad for her. If this were a music video, I'd picture an innocent little girl in a white nightgown holding her parents fingers; then the screen would get fuzzy like on a television set, and there would be darkness and blood in the background, and a low, spiteful voice that is the voice in her head. The ideas in this story could be written as a song. I can see it, ha ha. Awesome.

Oh, you should take that Sci Fi alien idea and roll with it. Totally. :D

I'm writing this review before I read your intended meaning of it at the end, just so I don't taint my own interpretation. So I assumed Emily is dying of some medical condition, though its very vague as to what it is. What threw me off a bit was the ending. Her parents are discussing what a beautiful baby she WAS, and then the parting line (I think yelled by Emily): "No! Wait, you can't! I'M NOT DONE Y–" leads me to believe that they're killing her somehow. I don't think this is your intention, but if it is, its very vague and should be brought in more; if its not I think you might consider reworking the end so its not too confusing. I liked your use of the Dickinson quote at the begining, it sets up the reader for the type of story this is very well. Overall I think this is a good start, but I think it could be worked on to make a little more sense (even though I know you're going for ambiguous, at times its too much of that, and then it creates work for the reader). Great job!

wow that was uh...something *clears throat*

personally, i thought the beginning was really confusing. when i started i was like "what's going on?" but i guess that's part of the style of the story, but i still felt that maybe you should put the dialogue and the description of who said it in the same paragraph? i dunno. that might lose its effectiveness but be less confusing. anyway it's all up to you.

what i really liked was that way emily always replied to her parents in her thoughts (not that they could hear her lol). it just shows how miserable this whole situation was and shows a really honest view of what was really happening. it goes beneath the surface.

overall, i really enjoyed it. the way you ended was simply superb!

this is the nicest story i ever read.
honestly...at first,i did't quite understand what the story's about...
however,after the explanation...i am quite impressed by it.
incredible.
=p