I think with the quotes you used periods when you should've used commas. For example, He kissed her temple and pointed to the computer screen. “By the way, you misspelled that word.” I think it should be a comma after screen, though I could be wrong.

I liked the piece though, it portrayed the realtionship very realistically. It showed their love, but in a realistic way, not cliched make me want to gag way. It was a nice little slice of life piece. Great job.

PS If you're bored check out the Review Game and/or the Review Marathon (links in my profile).