 Rabendaryu 2009-05-05 . chapter 1Well! This was surely entertaining to read. Your characters interact with each other very well, and they seem to have pretty solid personalities.
I do however, have to say that there isn't much in the story BESIDES speaking to each other. In the beginning, Memster obviously addresses Trukk-not-Munky and Munky, but as the actual story progresses, you haven't given much in the way of providing the reader with a setting or even description of characters (which I also struggle with).
I'm not trying to offend you, I hope you understand. I'm only trying to provide constructive criticism. I hope it helps. |