There were so many little lines in this that I was immensely impressed with. One of my favorites? Probably, “Giving up sounded nice, but it was so hard when your heart was still beating.” Ah, that’s just a great line! Your plot was good and unique. Over all this short story kind of reminds me of Kelly Link’s short stories. It’s just so full of wit yet makes a point. There were some grammar issues but nothing major. All in all this was a good read. Nice work!

I'll have to add this one to my Something Twisted archive. I really loved it!

I liked the dialogue quite a bit. There was no physical description, but the dialogue carried these ghosts completely--and somehow managed to give me a visual of them. I automatically knew what they were like from their voices, so you did a great job there.

I also really loved that ending. It wasn't quite shocking, but it was completely fulfilling and twisted in its own special way. Very nicely done!

The different lines of "last words" were great, too. Very entertaining and witty. Nice job all around.

--ADS, The Review Marathon (for more info, see the link on my profile)