I realize this story hasn't been updated in ages, but that doesn't change the fact that I've been enjoying it very much. It's got this sense of discovery that's just thrilling. And I don't just mean discovering what's going on, though obviously that's an important part of it. But it also feels like Cam is discovering things about herself, and so is Tes.

The ideas of listening and not knowing, knowing but not doing, and perhaps most importantly, knowing but not understanding, are all very thought provoking. Best of all, they're not wholly limited to this kind of setting, so even we comparatively mundane readers can emphasize with the conflicts. The circumstances may be strange, but the characters are actually very relate-able.

Even Tes, overwhelmed and confused as she is, taps into those fundamental feelings that makes it possible to relate to her. It would've been all too easy to write her like some kind of incomprehensible alien, but you didn't. I certainly can't quite imagine all the things going through her head, but her emotions manage to come through very strongly. Perhaps they're even enhanced by their erratic unpredictability, because don't we all feel that way sometimes? For all its fantastical occurrences, this is still a story about people. I thank you for that. It's frustrating how many writers on this site don't manage to do that.

First person stories are tricky to write without sounding obnoxious, but you keep the narration both interesting and relevant. Your dialogue is also amazingly strong. When I'm reading certain plays I always find myself mouthing the words - if not saying them aloud - because there's just something very alive about how they're written. From just one line I have an idea of what tone I'd use, what my body language would be, and so forth. This happens very rarely in novels, because there's so much else to distract from the dialogue. I end up thinking more about their thought process than I do sensing their emotions and physicality. Very rarely does a novel let me really do both. But I'm almost embarrassed to say that there were parts of this story that I found myself reading out loud. If this were adapted into a play, I would do everything I could to get a part in it.

It doesn't seem like you plan to continue this story, which I admit has me a little disappointed. But the portion of it that's here is certainly worth praise, and with only thiry-some-odd reviews I didn't think you'd gotten quite enough of it yet. I hope this review does something to correct that. So, thank you very much for sharing this.

I love this story and I hope you continue on with it. Very Good!

WOW! I think Cam is finally beginning to realize that Tes is so much more than she's been imagining. And I think it's wonderful that both of them are getting attached. Keep up the awesome work!

I guess I just want to know what's going on with Tesday and why things are happening. It's intriguing, but kinda feels like being strung along. Sorry I can't be specific, but that's the impression I feel while reading, just sort of 'frustrated' at not knowing and with the girls still interacting much the same, although they have grown closer emotionally and physically.

I liked that the emotions of the two girls is progressing; it's sweet.

Nope, I have no idea but I like the story.

Someone is out of their element: how exciting!

I'm just trying to find the reveal if there is one; like the original characters and how Camille is getting more life to live through Tesday than the monotony that she's so accustomed to.

"Curiouser and curiouser" said Alice.

I'm really wishing I could add this to my favorites. Gr.

Amazingly addictive story, if you ever go pro let me know so I can grab your books.

looking forward to more.

it sounds like Tesday is desperate for human contact and might be nudging Cam along because Cam isn't very good at the whole contact thing. great chapter :-)

Foreign films for the win! I love them to death, but you know this. I liked this chapter, and the feedback with the mom. Mom, at the moment, seems a smidge flat, but I'm sure it's all a part of your maniacle plan, right? Right.

I don't think the kiss was too fast. Especially with Tesday's little excuse. It makes it comical and lighthearted but with a smidge of "Is there more?" You know? :D

I could actually see this whole scene play out in my head as I read it, and that's so awesome!

That was really good! It got me interested immediately and kept me reading 'til the end.

Looking forward to updates!

Hey, it's me. I don't wanna log on but I want to review...I'm so tired...my 19th birthday wasn't really special..

LOVED the story XD It's great :)