This is very ... realistic? You capture the poor little soul and give it a vividness.

In my opinion the first line of the final stanza would work better without the comma splitting it, it seems to stunt the flow for no real reason. Just my two cents though, this is really good :)

An original twist on the ugly duckling's story. This poem says a lot about life. An ugly person may be teased for his looks, while beautiful people may not have any true friends. Excellent piece!

Again, the rhyming scheme is pleasant to read and holds a catchy lyrical form in the reader's mind. If this is a metaphor, it's well structured. Also, the last line of the final stanza really brings the piece together.

This was brilliant - there is no way to be 'in' unless you're average, and in reality who wants to be average?
I loved the use of extremes to show how society will alienate a person and the rhyme scheme was AMAZING. It flowed and didn't sound forced at all! Like, I mean that, BEAUTIFUL rhyme.
Haha (this is not a correction) the one thing I may have done differently in your place was when you said "Hoping teasing words, would leave and let him be." I may have changed to 'Hoping those with teasing words would live and let him be' And I only say that because my brain has been conditioned to think of live and let live... I don't know, my way probably makes the poem more cliche (so leave it your way!)
Also it was incredible that you got the theme of loss of innocence in on such a simple(in a good way) poem. It speaks volumes about your abilities as a writer and helps convey many messages to the reader without being overbearing in the least!
Great work!

Why do you insist on making me cry!

The poor sweet thing just needs love! aw

Aw!! The 2nd stanza actually made me aww out loud! "The little bird not loved, soon cried a lonely tweet. He waddled all alone, to sit beneath a tree," Dear oh dear..

The word "freak" seems a little out of place here, because it's not conventionally used in poems or fairy tales, but it does remind people of normal life and makes the moral of the story more apparent XD

I liked the way you gave it a sad ending.. It's like somehow from being too ugly, he's suddenly too beautiful to fit in with the rest. Either way he is lost.

~fleur

I love it. Kinda sad, but very well written. A lot of people can easily relate.