|Reviews for The Danger of Sincerity|
| A Merry Savant 7/11/11 . chapter 4
This is your second work that I've read; the first was "Waiting for the World."
Speaking of which, I loved the tension between Tyler and Noel. The way Tyler approaches Noel? Hot. I wonder where he learned his moves. The pacing was nice, although if the set-up of the story wasn't such a hook, Noel's immaturity would have eliminated any suspension of disbelief. But I'm just a fogey old teenager that's overly critical. Don't mind this personal opinion. All in all, splendid work.
As for this story... :3 I'm looking forward to the development. I immensely enjoy the comments in bold, and the shifts in scene. Keeps things interesting. Although I'm slightly lost as to where the term "English Girl" comes from here, I think you've found a new fan in me.
Ahh... just one more thing. I remember in the first chapter reading that Max was wearing tight, black fighting pants. If you ever go back and edit that phrase, please keep "fighting" and "pants" together without "black" separating that couple.
| CrimsonSilence 3/4/11 . chapter 4
roflmao yeah I love it. This story is pretty hysterical. Krish is pretty grand and Jai's just a complete idiot. Sam is amusing though. I hope you plan on continuing this story! I'll await an update
| eclipsia soulbird 2/11/11 . chapter 4
Somehow I've forgotten my password... Anywho-
I LOVE this story. I know you haven't updated in a year and are therefore unlikely ever to, but WOW! Finding this story just brightened my entire year. There is not one sentence I dislike in any of the four chapters. Each character is incredible and easy to relate to - so much so that I am astounded to never have crossed this story before, or that it hasn't received more reviews (although for FP, 15 for 4 chapters is quite more than usual).
| MoonWalker28 12/8/10 . chapter 4
This has to be one of the best stories I've ever read on FictionPress! I love the characters because they seem so real and I feel like I could be good friends with all of them.
Come on, you can't stop and leave us all hanging after four chapters! Update, update, update!
P.S. Quick Question: Are you Indian? Because I am too, and it's cool to see some of my natives FP. REPRESENT!
...Okay, I'll stop now...
| Dorkified and Lovely 2/15/10 . chapter 4
Well it's about time! haha I liked your use of the words "humping" and "spew". Classy, like Jai!
| smile at the sun 2/14/10 . chapter 4
updated this story, finally. I'm still loving the characters, though Jai is probably my least favourite, on account of him being a huge idiot, but of course he still has room to redeem himself. though i have to say, ;), it'll be hard for him to shake that huge impression he made on Phoebe and Max. I can't wait to see what happens next, and if I was Phoebe, I would so be crushing on Krish right now. great writing. Please update soon.
| Kjersti 9/22/09 . chapter 3
This story is very entertaining. The characters are interesting and you write well. Can't wait to read more. :)
| K.M.Mackenzie 9/4/09 . chapter 3
Man, you must've updated this a while ago, but I've been hellishly busy for the past forever. I only got around to it today (despite the fact that I have this weekend to complete an entire Historical Investigation, as well as a comparative essay between Joseph Conrads' *The Heard of Darkness* and Baz Lurman's film *Strictly Ballroom* on the grounds of the concept 'journey', AND a group art assignment on the Surrealist René Magritte. Year 11 sucks ass). Enough woe-is-me-ing.
So, you didn't flip POV's enough to see Krish and Jai (pouts) but we're making some plot progress. I don't particularly understand this bolded 3rd person who seems to comment every 6th of the page. Some further explanation of that plot device would be appreciated.
But, you know, it was particularly hilarious, as per the usual.
WHAT ABOUT WAITING ON THE WORLD?
| Dorkified and Lovely 7/20/09 . chapter 3
holy frickin toledo. I love this. It's hilarious. (and though Sam is, well Sam, I can't help but be in love with Krish. I mean, he gets Pride and Prejudice! so date worthy) can't wait for the next chaptar
| mgouda 7/5/09 . chapter 3
...have you read The Book Thief? lol your writing for this piece kind of reminds me of it.
| smile at the sun 7/5/09 . chapter 3
great chapter. the irony of Max actually knowing the person who died after gatecrashing those other funerals was something. and Sam is pretty good at talking to Max. and I loved-
“Funeral,” they answer in unison.
Phoebe sighs with the loneliness of someone who has realised that they are the only person in the room with a slither of sense.
He looks like an average guy, but Max is starting to suspect that beneath that mass of hair and friendly smile, lurks a force to be reckoned with.
It will be interesting seeing Max and Jai actually interact with each other. and see more of Krish! great writing. please update soon.
| Jazzy Kitty 7/1/09 . chapter 2
Just wanted to let you know, this story is amazing. It's hilarious and edgy and I love how you plunge the reader straight into the characters' worlds and personalities. You've done a great job with the individual characters - they're all funny, with their own quirks, and despite any obvious flaws they're likeable and easy to relate to. Great job, keep up the good work! Can't wait to see the next chapters!
| smile at the sun 7/1/09 . chapter 2
I love your new story. It's definetely more light-hearted/funnier than your other one, and I love the cast. especially Max and Phoebe, and I love those last lines of Sam, and that Jai actually enjoyed the chick flicks (not that he'd admit it), and I have a (notsolittle) crush on Krish and his accent. great writing. please update soon.
| incognitus 7/1/09 . chapter 2
The last part where the three guys compared notes on "How to be The Perfect Guy" was plain hilarious. Jai's notes was 'you-suck, loser', Krish's notes was 'okay, finally a guy who gets it...wait, Andy McDowel?', and Sam's ones were just 'what the hell, are you high?'. Haha. The "she's got me lovestoned etc" part was so absurdly funny, I couldn't help laughing and earned myself funny stares from strangers in the library. Ops. So yeah, just wanted to drop by and say thanks, you totally made my day with that. )
| K.M.Mackenzie 6/30/09 . chapter 2
Oh bub, I like the ammendment to the summary; reads much better than before. But you don't serendate to somone, you just serenade them *winks*
lol on your reply, Jellicoe Road has two different stories, but they're both related. The actual protagonist is in high school though, year 12. She's quite effed up in terms of characters, but yeah, still someone you could walk up to on the street and instantly believe was a real person. (God I wish I was as good at characterisation as you and Melina are... *envy*)
Did you know that chocolate milk is one of the most highly regarded recovery/energizer drinks in the sporting industry? Kind of like Powerade or Up 'n Go (uck!) I learnt that last weekend.
lol at Sam's drunken affection, regardless of gender. XD
I would say "...ticking the names off on his fingers." Unless he truly is crossing his fingers...(?)
Phoebe's snack food preferences totally agree with me. I'm hungry just reading the list :)
Boy can I relate to this age of the noisy, pollution farting car. Great, great line. Excellent!
Good use of this perfefct guy concept, having 4 different ideals to compare with. It's a nice literary technique. I'm loving these char's, can't wait for more. And what about Waiting on the World, eh? I need another fix! xx