This was interesting. Danny seems like an interesting character.

I think you could probably delete the prologue and just begin with chapter 1. I wasn't convinced you needed those small paragraphs. I'm learning that some agents/editors won't read past the word prologue -- so unless its dramatically necessary you might reconsider the tactic overall if publication is your end game.

Don't forget punctuation before the end quote. In some places you were missing commas/periods.

I expected more reaction from the bartender or the other patrons. The casual dialogue after the near brawl didn't seem quite credible. You could have the bartender follow Danny out with a "hey kid" sort of comment. Or have a patron react. The authority figure dishing out a reward didn't seem to fit for me.

The paragraph early about school -- I'd delete and save that for later. Move into the story a bit faster. School doesn't seem quite relevant or necessary to develope the character and it bogs the pacing down to have too much info upfront.

Hope this was helpful. Please post another chapter soon - I'd like to see what happens.

Not bad, keep going.

These days, all stories are common. But what counts is how you execute it. There's nice apple pie, and crap apple pie.

All you need to do now, is to give your characters more character, more distinct personalities.

So far, there's external conflict. Cool.

Nice start. We're all trying to be writers!

(But to get into the publishing companies is hell hell and hell.)