|Reviews for neverland after dark|
| drink me pretty 11/28/09 . chapter 5
"(i'll mend myself, thanks)"-Ha! I adore that line. Seriously, I do.
| drink me pretty 11/11/09 . chapter 1
your prose is stunning. can't wait to read the rest of this, and eventually catch up to your latest pillowbook...
| EBSmith 9/29/09 . chapter 16
I get it now, I didn't realise it had other chapters! So to correct this, I am sending you second review! :D
A very nice little collection, you clearly have talent and know what you are doing, they all seem to have purpose. But some of the quiky grammatical use, is a little over used, and in places seems forced.
| EBSmith 9/29/09 . chapter 1
Interesting. Rather sweet and broody, though I don't think I appreciate the 'un(der)defined', it seems you are trying to make a point, but it's not really coming across.
Why have so many people reviewed this so many times?
| Saurosuchus 9/29/09 . chapter 4
this piece is a lot to think about. lots of emphasis, very colorful, figuratively speaking. I think the formatting was very well suited and added a lot. powerful work.
| Saurosuchus 9/29/09 . chapter 1
this rocks, quite frankly. with such a simple poem, you described a true and in-depth image.
| Violet Vialyn 9/29/09 . chapter 3
love the use of parentheses, very creative.
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 10
I love how all of your pieces are so different and they all intrigue me. Amazing ending.
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 9
Oh I love the last line! & this one, "you were never known for being sincere" Great job!
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 8
Haha I did find this funny, even if you weren't trying to be. It's interesting to see how peoples mind works and how one thought leads to another but in the end it all just circles around and leads back to the original subject. Funny how that works.
I liked reading this along with all of your other poetry, it just shows that there are different layers to people and shows another side.
I do enjoy reading this pillowbook :)
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 7
"You can take notice of the world submerging in an ocean of pain without going through the trouble of clinging to a lifeboat of optimism, without wasting your time convincing yourself the sun will dry all the tears away before everything you know drowns in them"
I love this part of this poem, such great imagery and metaphors are used and it all just seems so devastating, it's wonderful.
The format and repetition of sink is just fantastic and adds so well to the piece.
Well done! :)
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 6
I love this entire thing with the similarities in the differences. I absolutely adore the second stanza!
| Little girl Big world 9/20/09 . chapter 5
| tonight we bloom 8/18/09 . chapter 6
I really like this one.
In the first stanza, I like the bolding of "sure" for more emphasis, but why the spaces in "rainbow?" and the bolds/italics/underlines in "indecisive? Another thing, you used "becasue" twice so closely together, however that may just be personal preference.
The second stanza is just brilliant. The contrast between wanting everything (royalty) and feeling like nothing (lonely city apartment)
The third stanza is beautiful, I love the phrase "newborn winds." However, why did you format "fourteen" like that? and "winds?"
And in the fourth stanza, why was wish written like "*wish*?"
And again in the last stanza, I love the use of many periods that creates a sense of distance (clever, clever) but why the bolds/underlines/italics in contradict?
I don't mean to sound harsh, I'm just wondering as to why you've formatted it this way. Is there meaning behind it or have you just done it to make it look better?
| tonight we bloom 8/18/09 . chapter 5
I don't know how you think of such wonderful ideas.