Great story...and very creative idea! I especially like the narrator...it's funny that she was named "the invisible woman" in high school. It reminds me of when I was named "most mysterious" back in the day.

Aw man that was adorable. Loved Noreen's act of heroism, for an invisible girl she sure pulled of the bad girl act. Lovely.

I told him to…ahem…do something that wasn’t anatomically possible.

favorite line in the story. lol. i think you did an excelent job with making her obsessed with a beverage of your choosing, and i never expected the blonde to be robbing them.

all in all, wonderful one-shot

Definite improvement! I think the dialogue at the end really helped define the change in their relationship.

-Has to be a OneShot above 2500 words, and below 10,0 words


Yours is only a little over 1800 words.

sorry, too lazy too log in...
but i LOVED this.
very original(:

Aw; this was cute! And a great angle on the "quiet girl". Thanks for participating!

:] I liked this. It was cute.
So this is a literally contest? I'm sure you'll get far!