Marvelous scene creation with the emotion and the imagery. I like the specific references, like "green converse" and "ruffled boyish hair". They create a visual tone for the work that the reader can understand universally. Well written. MD:77.

oh, there's something charming in this that i like a lot. you almost lost me at "concert with green converse shoes..." but the rest was unique and cool enough that i liked it a lot a lot. i wish i could give you something more useful than "it's good!" but, if the shoe fits...
keep up the good work!