It's really great, update soon!

WHOOPS. Forgot to login. Oh well! This is really fantastic, I love your descriptions. Update soon!

o i knew the father would have a good reason! and the letter was good and emotional although the readers knew most of those thoughts already but it was good for Rose to finally know :D

the letter was...everything a girl would want to receive from a man whom she loves. That's the one thing I hate about fiction, it looks so good on paper it hardly ever appears in reality.
I hope Rebekah goes back to Dan

You know, at first I wasn't sure if I liked the fact that you'd cut half their conversation but, having thought about it, Bekah's reading the letter after hanging up on him says a lot more about her than having her listen to everything he had to say and THEN reading the letter. So good decision there.

Hopefully, though, Dan will get to have his say sometime soon. Properly, I mean. Face to face and preferably in an environment where Bekah is forced to face up to things and not run away. Ugh. I hate that so much.

Nice chapter, though.

~ Marie

Ah, it was even better reading the letter the second time around. Especially since I'm not just reading the letter by itself, but with Bekah's emotional state at this time in mind. I also really appreciate the inclusion of their spiritual side. To not only care about the physical and the emotional, but the spiritual side of the person as well, well that's true love in my opinion. What will Rose do now? Nuture the Rose or feed the aphids? I love it!

Whoa! I can't believe this either. So now the drama has kicked up a few notches. I really like knowing what happened between her parents. Poor Rose.

YAY! We finally got to see the email. I was really anxious to know what the email said for so long.
Same old Lang Syne. I LOVE that song! It really fit perfectly in this chapter and with Rose and Dan.
And you threw Smallville in there, its one of my favorite shows! ^_^

How many weeks is the next chapter going to skip to?

-Liz :D

Truly truly amazing chapters. I really loved Dans' rationalization in the start of this chapter. I mean, it honestly makes sense that Rose would dress like that to entice him. And the fact that she's so insecure about herself so she feels like she has to wear those kinds of clothes to get guys to notice her...it makes a lot of sense. I really think that you are getting better at writing as the chapters progress. I mean, all the little details tie in so well together. And there's so much thought process behind it that it's fantastic.

I really enjoyed this chapter and finding out about the truth of why her parents broke up...that's going to present even more things for Bekah to overcome. Ugh I can't wait for your next update! :D

Whew! I finally got through the chapter! Not because it was hard to read or too long, but because of my time constraints. Ah! You explained that kiss Bekah initiated. I agree that it was twisted. But as we know, Bekah is very all over the place emotionally. I'm getting curious to finding more about how Brian fits into her feelings of men. That question where she doesn't see herself with a husband is very disturbing esp. the reason behind not having a husband. Ok, onward to the next chapters! lol

haha your over 110, so get updating :D

Great job! I can't wait for more to happen!

whoa, whoa, WHOA! I cannot believe her mom cheated and her dad had cancer. :O
If Rose has a breakdown again, I wouldn't blame her. I mean she just had this huge bombshell dropped on her all of a sudden. All the more reason for her to take some time off and go with Dan to help her clear her mind.
I'm also hoping to see her confront her mom about no ttelling the truth. ^_^

As far as I could tell, you had no mistakes. :)

-Liz :D

Rose is tiring me. I know that's exactly what you're going for, but...I don't know. It's in her personality to be stubborn, but when does it become too much?

You wanted me to look over Bekah's section, right? Yeah, I think so. Ok. First, though, I have to say the formatting is so weird! I wonder why it did that. Huh. Strange. Also, love that song. It fits this chapter so well.

1) I'm glad you cut out all the travel from the start of Bekah's section. It's a much snappier read now.

2) This was probably a mistake on my part when I initially went over the chapter, but you've used "squeezed" or "squeezing" twice in 2 consecutive paragraphs.
"Her only concern was squeezing through the tight alleyway..." and then "Her father squeezed her hand..." I should have picked up on that. Sorry.

3) "...she guessed she would have deserved it..." - Should be: "...she guessed she would deserve it..."

4) "Have a seat, Baby;..." - That semi-colon should be a comma.

5) I'm really liking all the thoughts you've added to Bekah. They make her snarkier and I think it works really well.

6) "...Mr. Fields used to do the same thing from his teacher thrown." - It should be THRONE.

7) Aha. I like this line: "I've got a fifty in my wallet. Does bribing you still work?" Very dad-like.

8) I'm really liking Ted. He's making me smile.

All right, I've finished reading. I think the chapter is fine. I didn't see any major issues. Lots of story questions and tension. Some good humour. It flows well. Overall, nothing to really complain about in my book. :)

~ Marie