really enjoyed all the chapters. You brough up tha characters perfectly and might I say those twins are evil and I'm very excited to know more about this boy who is now in the house. Please post again soon and if you could read and review my story's too that would be great!

oh! calvin klein! sweet! XD update soon!

Interesting first chapter. You definitely set up the scene well and the characters started to take shape. Her mum sure seems awfully self-centred - glad she's managing to take hold of her own life now

Sounds like a pretty cool plot coming up too, haven't come across it much before. Would be interesting to see how you go with it. ]

-scripted

This seems like a good story so far! I didn't notice any technical errors throughout, which was very nice. Kudos to you for getting a beta reader and cleaning it up, it makes it seem much more professional.

The story also seems interesting! I didn't get a really strong impression of Paige's character from this, but her mom definitely stood out, haha. She was very amusing.

The dialogue is pretty good, so nice job with that!

I plan on reading more, but I don't know if I'll get to it tonight. Great job, though!

- Angel's Requiem, from The Roadhouse!

Wow, not a great best friend there, and I do use that term loosely. I really enjoyed that flashback scene and it was well done. The ending really made me crack up, in a weird way (I have a dark humor). Great chapter!

Nice pics. Oh I see the children are being litle brats I deal with that some times but not to that affect. I wodner who the male character is? Sorry I can be a bit slow sometimes so I am not sure if he showed up earlier or not. Again a good chapter and honestly I never heard of any kid beign afraid of Barney the Dinosaur hated him but not afraid.

Love your quotations at the start! I loved this chapter, good use of a memory, and solid characters as usual :) I really like Paige and you definitely developed her here. The ending was brill as well... promising and just a little disturbing - great set up for next time. Awesome work as usual, update soon :) *goes to look at pictures* Luke

lool the last line was awesome (so was the whole story ) paha update

Hah wat kid wouldnt be afraid of barney the dinousour?:P Well the brother made a dramatic exit didnt he?

This story is good at the moment update soon

things only keep getting more and more interesting with your story

nice chapter

can't wait for more

update soon!

D

I'm glad you put in a little background/history for Paige. I feel like I know her a little better now.

I'm also happy to see that the male lead is now present in the story. I'm looking forward to seeing what his story is-why he left home and whatnot.

Good image of a little kid running around naked and cowering because of Barney. Nice idea.

Well, it really seems that Paige's past will have a certain effect on the romance aspect of the plot. As for the two kids, I guess I'll go nuts if it was me who would look after them. I do find the Barney part a real lol though. My cousin's kid absolutely loved that purple critter. :D Which led me to suggest that if you want to create a certain humour, this can be a good area to start with. :) But I do think it's a bit illogical on the children behaviour that the two kids acted grumpily to Paige's threat instead of going to a certain state of hysterical reaction. It's like if they were truly scared of Barney, they would have displayed a certain knee-jerk reaction. I think this is one thing you might need to work on here. As for the ending of this chapter, it seems that the romance focus will start very soon.

P.S: Pay back via The Elven Chronicles. That's all I can think of since you've more or less reviewed my latest updated stories apart from Circles of Arven, which is a whooping forty plus long ongoing fic, hence you might be stressed in reading everything in one shot.

-From The Roadhouse. :)

Ugh, Billie's a bitch. I hate it when 'friends' stab you in the back like that. Poor Paige. I feel bad for all the heatache she had to put up with. And to top things off, the bro's home. Quite an exciting chapter. Good job!

Ok, you started off with a great beginning (the dialogue between Mrs. Darling and her daughter was an excellent way to introduce your story, - and by the way I love how you also started with a quote), and the way you ended it was great as well.

There are a few cases in the story that are a little unrealistic (i.e: if this family is one of the richest in the country, would they really post an ad on the internet for babysitting their children, when anyone could answer?).

Also, I really like Paige; I think she sounds responsible and yet spontaneous, and she also sounds like an intelligent girl. But you have to be careful not to turn her into a Mary Sue ( "Paige shook her beautiful auburn hair..."), as this can be a major turn off to many readers.

Other than that, your grammar and spelling were pretty good, albeit a little stiff.