|Reviews for The Rise of Estancia|
| Taurus 2/21/10 . chapter 19
Great chapter. So far I found one error in it. In about the middle of the chapter the conversation bewteen Jessica and Kain:
"You must have some kind of headquarters," Drake said, searching the area to the best of his abilities. "Take me there and we can discuss it in full then."
I believe that it should be Kain said and not Drake said.
| Taurus 1/17/10 . chapter 12
Finally some more action. Bring on chapter 13 please
| Chesterfield 10/29/09 . chapter 2
So, first off, obviously the first chapter is almost entirely in italics and I'd be lying if I said it wasn't distracting.
But, it's totally forgivable because I think you are an amazing writer. Even though the dialogue is a little cliche, it's fine because I get the feeling you're trying to put across a certain vibe, so it was all very entertaining. Try to switch up your "speaking" verbs and keep going because you're doing a great job.