 Pants 2009-11-30 . chapter 9 I'm confus'd. |
 Cool Story Bro :D 2009-11-30 . chapter 9 That would suck to be itchy in a strait jacket D: |
 John 2009-11-29 . chapter 9 "as blood trickles from a heavily mutilated wound on the side of my neck."
DAMNIT ALICE
Why do you gotta put vampires in every story you make?
:C x 10 |
 Anthony 2009-11-29 . chapter 9 DOes this soft floor hurt? why is she bleeding |
 correh 2009-11-28 . chapter 8 ahahah
idk if it was meant to be
but the first part cracked me up :D
and all i see is RAPED |
 correh 2009-11-28 . chapter 7 this doesnt make much sense to me now D: |
 Joseph 2009-11-18 . chapter 8 I think he's been asylumed... i guess we shall see. I don't see the significance of the itching... unless he's been in poison ivy when he ran. Is he in a straight jacket? Or handcuffed? Hmm... Leaves a little mystery. This chapter is different, but in a good kinda way. |
 Joseph 2009-11-18 . chapter 7 I really really really like the beginning 3 lines. Very nicely written. But.. "the man is" the monster is slightly too illogical... I don't buy it =(. |
 Joseph 2009-11-18 . chapter 6 Ok... true creepiness has set in... But now i see the uniqueness of your narrative, how it's all narrative and no action, yet it conveys action through a really natural way (CONGRATS ^__^). Hmm... the only thing i have to say is that...the "She will run and I will never get the chance again." was kinda unrealistic, basically that paragraph. I'm sure if she ran he would have caught her, and the time it took the narrator to be indecisive, he could have killed her already because she was visibly hesitating. Unless... i misunderstood, and he only killed her in self-defence... Hmm... we shall see,cause the message i got was that he was there with the intention to kill (b/c that's vengeance) |
 Joseph 2009-11-18 . chapter 5 LOOL! Nice twist =O. It was really entertaining to see that the narrator has the same mentality as a psychotic murderer (leaf style!!)... irony was kinda fun. |
 Joseph 2009-11-18 . chapter 4 Now i'm starting to see the creepiness XD
Hmm... voice is consistent but it's starting to get kinda redundant, but still it gets the creepy/obsessionist point across. I dun really know how it can get many more chapters from here, but we shall see =O. I imagine it will be... narrator confronts her... something happens, does something more creepy, happy ending? |
 - 2009-11-18 . chapter 8 The door is not soft.
It was made by for those who are crazy.
And the door keeps them in.
Until the end of time,
The door is not soft. |
 John 2009-11-18 . chapter 8 Pretty aite, I like how this story began with a simple leaf :) |
 Pants 2009-11-18 . chapter 8 Oh shi-! Got sent to the crazy house! nu. Now who will rid the world of leaf crushing horrors. D= |
 Not Lillian 2009-11-16 . chapter 7 trippy :O
but I like it
it'd be awesome if you gave him a chainsaw and just let him loose on the whole city xDD
keep writing~ can't wait to see what other adventures you have in store for us readers and the crazy schizophrenic kid :D |