Hey, Chris.

While an interesting and possibly controversial topic, it again lacks rhythm. For example:

[Impartial to the blight]

Has six syllables.

[But I can see that this path is not right]

This has TEN syllables. If you want a story to flow, you need to syllables to be exact or close enough. The rhymes aren't the important aspect of a poem. The way it moves with itself is.


George~

to be honest I think about the same, sometimes people instead of teaching, they're just "teaching" what they want but not the important things.