I love journals without lines. I have an amazing poetry journal with random quotes from writers or inspirational ideas and I adore it, but it's falling apart, which makes me sad. I don't know what date you first posted this, so I can't really say about the bad feeling, but if it was last year sometime, then definitely yes. Last year was terrible for me and my family.

You said to do what?, and I thought, well shit. I'm never going to get through 45 chapters, but I did and I'm so pleased I did. I was also thinking of saying some shit about confusion and hopelessness and loss and stuff, but what do I know, anyway? I like how it slowly progresses from rambling to something clear and cohesive, and towards the end I kept wanting to click the review button to say 'this is my favorite entry', but then clicked the next button and decided the next entry was my favorite, and so on.

I love that last line, and everything else you've written thus far. I'd review every chapter, because your little snippets of, what was it, active search for poetic expression? are so full of insight and things I find so true but never thought of, but if I reviewed every chapter you'd sooner or later be reading a huge essay's worth (and I don't have time).

'is there a lost and found for when you lose touch with yourself?' - that's so clever. I'm going to have to remember that (promise I won't use it or anything.)

I found the concept in this piece interesting and worth while to read. Bravo. I hope to read the others in this collection very soon. :)

But if you can write, you can paint pictures with your words. :) It's just a matter of figuring out how to get it down into the right words that really bring the scene to life. I wish I was good at other forms of art, but I'm content to be a writer at the same time. :)

You know, you have a point. It makes sense and if people want to kill themselves, then . . . (I know, typical non-smoker attitude, but really.)

Of course I get the reference. :) The amazing Regina. Therefore, I am cool. ;)

Oh, I agree about tattoos. Just never thought about it that way before. But it's very true. Interesting. Keep writing! :)

I hate money, too. It's a necessary evil, unfortunately. I have to spend mine on bills and a lot of them. The ills of being an adult, I guess. I don't mind working most of the time, though. Otherwise I'm just lazy and that's not a good thing.

I feel almost wrong complementing your writing because the emotions are so raw and hitting. I've held my breathing many times reading through this, and it's only an "active search for poetic expression". To read your real, refined work, I fear might be overwhelming. Will anyway.

Shouldn't call this gorgeous, sounds inappropriate. Lo and behold, this is gorgeous.

Like the comparing the "road" to game-play at the end. You don't come across greedy in your writing. The fact that you fess up and pen as adamantly as you do proves something.

Of course, I'm in no place to give you a lot of my judgment, but, happiness and discontent, companions? Unless I've read over this wrong. They don't give us much hope, it's too trying to give hope. Be happy and discontent; but, is it possible to be content and unhappy?

Good luck, anyway.

The repeating same phrases over and over I tend to do sometimes. Though, I usually try to make use of it then toss it aside whether than analyze some more. Not sure which is the better path.