Brilliant. Fictionpress has really helped me discover poetry and the countless forms it comes in, and I love your form. It really helps convey your message, and is very unique. I also love the P.S., it really adds vulnerability to your poem, in contrast to the first few stanzas.

whoa. I love the punctuation, especially the "In addition!" opening to the second stanza.

you make me want to fall in love,

because it sounds just a little like

suicide.

(masochism)